Between SEX & SEXUALITY: WHAT DO OUR PRECIOUS CHILDREN KNOW?: Raising An ALARM!!!

FORWARD
This is an ALARM!!! like no other…Though it is longer than usual, it raises critical issues about the well-being of our precious children, which you MUST read, understand and DEFEND for POSTERITY sake…I await your comments after the long read. Thank you sirs & mas…If is for the preservation of the gentle souls of our precious children, methinks it is worth the TIME & SWEAT…

THERE FIRE ON THE MOUNTAIN
There is fire on the mountain, my fellow primary and secondary caregivers…

My field experience, interactions with our precious children and fellow caregivers reveal to me beyond a shadow of doubt  that we have a very serious moral crisis in our hands today. As serious as it is, it is yet insidious, surreptitious and seemingly innocuous…Subtly and silently devouring the soul and morality of our children like a little fox, which is yet mighty in its Irreparably negative impact.

Alas, our children are exposed…They are over-exposed to sex, its knowledge, practices and perversions. I mean they are not only exposed to the knowledge, they engage or indulge themselves in the act.

AN ERA OF UNGUARDED SOCIALIZATION
You do not need to look too far to see the validation of my submission…With unguarded socialization today, which promote sex as the acceptable social language of interaction of the 21st Century, they are bound to know more than enough and necessary…From music, movies, adverts to social media, we see a large population of primary and secondary caregivers, who are not only unaware of their role and responsibility of censorship but have completely lost hold of same…We even have instances, where the caregivers are the ones exposing the children to sex-inundated materials in the name of music, movies and entertainment.

MY CONCERN
My concern today is that our children know so much about sex, its practices and multi-dimensional perversions, which have terrible physical and psychological impact on them…The extensiveness of their knowledge will only shock the naïve caregivers, who are either oblivious or pretend to be oblivious of the fact that children by the design of nature take after the dominant nature of their environment…It is called socialization…The child’s behaviour today is a function of his/her psychology…But his/her psychology is a function of his/her socialization…That is why I keep saying that socialization is superior to psychology…

SEX  OR SEXUALITY: WHICH IS HOT THE CAKE?
My concern today is that children’s knowledge of SEX far far outweigh their knowledge of their SEXUALITY. In fact I make bold to say that our children seem to know everything about SEX and almost nothing about their SEXUALITY. Recently, we were dealing with the case of a 3(three) old boy who was climbing girl children in his class. The other day I was invited by a school to deal with the issue of a 12 year old boy in Junior Secondary school, who derived pleasure from touching the breasts of female students and running away…It became a very rampant habit the necessitated sending him on suspension after several warnings and meeting with his parents. The school was amazed that upon resumption, the child resumed the habit. The school was on the verge of expelling the child, as his case seemed irredeemable…

SEXUALITY IS BIGGER THAN SEX
SEXUALITY is far bigger than SEX…I make bold to say that SEX is a minute part of SEXUALITY, where SEX is properly defined as the legitimate, intimate, covenant-based and above all divinely-ordained exercise between a man and a woman, who are married.

SEX AS PROMOTED TO OUR PRECIOUS CHILDREN TODAY
Please note that the perverted SEX to which our children are exposed to today is far-apart different from the one defined above. SEX, as it is presented and vigorously promoted to our children today speaks of an uncontrollable heat of sexual passion, which possesses children, young people and unmarried couples of opposite sex or same same to engage in all forms of sexual relationships, from foreplay, oral sex to sexual intercourse. Besides, our children are being told that there are other sexual orientations or sexes other than the 2(male and female), which God ordained. At my last count, we are told that there are over 58(fifty-eight) genders and this is widely promoted by the social media platforms, where most our children now spend most of their time and life uncensored. For example, Facebook has 3 columns for GENDER, namely, MALE, FEMALE and CUSTOM. Under CUSTOM, there are 58(fifty-eight) genders listed. You are also asked, ‘what pronoun do you prefer?’ The options are: MALE: him, FEMALE: her and NEUTRAL: them…The social media platform provides opportunity for users to select more than one gender. Research has shown that there are over 20 million children on Facebook, the social media platform’s terms of service having require users to be at least 13 years old…Of the 20 million children, 7.5 million are below age 13, while 5 million are age 10 and below, who didn’t properly represent their real age. As at 2013 statistics reveal that there are 11 million Facebook users in Nigeria and the most popular age group are Nigerians under 25 years old.

SEXUALITY: MY WORKING UNDERSTANDING
SEXUALITY here refers to the ESSENCE of a person’s gender and his/her attitude to same.   SEXUALITY speaks to the physiological and psychological specifications of the male and female genders, their functions and differences. SEXUALITY addresses the relationship between the male and female genders and how they seamlessly partner according to the dictates of their distinct natural specifications in divine order to achieve God’s eternal purpose for the creation of man(male and female). SEXUALITY speaks of the GLORY and BEAUTY  in the difference between the male and female genders and the DIGNITY of EQUALITY of both genders.

HAVE WE LOST CONTROL?
Today’s caregivers seem to have lost control in the face of over democratization of media platforms…They are not able to define the pressure, not to talk accepting the need to  acquire the requisite and inevitable skills to deal with same in the best interest of the child.

Today, the media, in connivance with the ignorant and unconscious primary and secondary caregivers does not teach our children about their SEXUALITY…As I can see today, there is no agenda in horizon on the part of today’s media, its promoters and investors and the ignorant primary and secondary caregivers to change their course of actions. The promoters and investors of the media smile to the banks, destroying the destiny of our precious children, cruising comfortably at a very high altitude on the ignorance and nonchalance of the primary and secondary caregivers.

WEAK AGENDA…WEAK RESULTS
The agenda of those who know better and seek to represent the protection of children from this war of indecent exposure and bastardization of their God-given and priceless gift of SEXUALITY is very high in unguarded anger and sporadic intervention. The agenda of the defenders of our children is very weak in vision, strategy, tactics, persistency, selflessness and sense of mission. We often think that a good cause succeeds simply because it is good. Unknown to us, causes, good or bad succeed because of the unalloyed commitment of their apologists to finding and adhering to superior strategy, using the inevitable instrumentalities of critical thinking and intelligence. I guess that is why Montesquieu said, ‘power does not shift except for superior power.’

SEXUALITY ABUSE: MY FURTHER DEFINITION
I have long argued that exposing children to inappropriate media contents, with direct sexual contents or innuendos constitutes nothing but sexual abuse as it perverts the children’s understanding of their sexuality. The implication of the foregoing is that it puts our precious children in a sad situation, where they participate actively in their own abuse either as perpetrated by a peer or an adult.

NO TO LIP SERVICE
My charge today is that all the lip services must stop, all the attention grabbing and hypocrisy must be repented of. Our precious children are far more sexually active than we are aware of or ready to admit.

SOBERING CONCLUSION
It is my very SOBER and well considered conclusion today that as we read this piece, we must make a strategic commitment to reserve the present ugly tide, which prepare and serve our children as ready prey of self and consensual sexual abuse to their peers and adults. We must begin serious conversations as adults and with our children, which aim is to help our children to discover their SEXUALITY as a mental and spiritual tool to understand the essence of their genders and how to take adequate and informed steps to preserve, protect, defend and celebrate same.

It is CHILDHOOD and its GLORY which come under vicious but subtle attack when our precious children are sexually abused through exposure to inappropriate materials.

OUR i-Protect4TWEENS&TWEENS ACADEMY
Like never before we have decided to take up the gauntlet of ENLIGHTENMENT and EMPOWERMENT through the launching of our i-Protect4TWEENS&TWEENS Academy on Saturday, October 24, 2015. It is bi-monthly academy, which is aimed to EMPOWER a minimum of 25(twenty-five) TWEENAGERS(8-12) and TEENAGERS on Personal Safety and Self-Protection.

Our other plans to stem this tide in our own little way, as we hope to gain more grounds shall be unfolded as we are good to go.

SOBER ON MY KNEES ON THE LORD’S DAY
Thank you for taking time out of your very busy schedule to ready this piece of advocacy, flowing from the depth of my heart as I remain SOBER on my knees and in the SPIRIT on this LORD’S Day. Do have an INSPIRED week.
Taiwo Akinlami

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#BringBackOurFUTURE…BringBackOurChildren…

The Nigerian child is under intense siege. We live in a country that is at war with her own future, her own precious children.

In the last 2 weeks, I have been on 2 of the leading national television stations, namely, Channels TV and TVC to discuss UNICEF’s reports on Malnutrition and Maternal and Child Health. I have opined in both programs that the state of the Nigerian child today is a clear demonstration of the failure of the state to live up to its primary responsibilities under its social contract with the people. These primary responsibilities are spelt our in the 1999 Constitution of the Federal Republic of Nigeria thus, ‘the security and welfare of the shall be the primary purpose of government.’

MALNUTRITION AND THE NIGERIAN CHILD According to a joint report of the Federal Government and UNICEF, released in August, 2015, approximately 1.7 million under-five children are acutely malnourished. The figure accounts for 10 percent of the global malnutrition population. The report further revealed that NEARLY A THOUSAND NIGERIAN CHILDREN DIE OF MALNUTRITION-RELATED CAUSES EVERYDAY, a total of 361,000 children each year, noting that 90 percent of childhood diseases occur because of malnutrition.

MATERNAL AND CHILD HEALTH
According to a report by UNICEF, ‘EVERY SINGLE DAY, Nigeria loses about 2,300 under-five year olds and 145 women of childbearing age. This makes the country the second largest contributor to under-five and maternal mortality rate in the world.

INSECURITY
According to UNICEF, Boko Haram uprooted 500,000 children in the last 5 months, bringing the total number of children on the run in the northeast Nigeria and neighboring countries to 1.4 million.

EDUCATION
According to the 2013 UNESCO report, approximately 10.5 million school age children are out of school. The nation holds the world record of having the highest number of its young people out of school.

I do not think there has been another time in our history that the Nigerian child has faced this kind of awful neglect and seemingly insurmountable abandonment.

The question is who are the children under siege? I do not think these are the children of the upper crust members of the society. I think these are the children of the poor, the hewers of wood and drawers of water, the children of ‘the wretched of the earth,’ as Fanon would refer to them. These are the children of the hoi polloi, the forgotten ‘citizens’ of a typical Third World nation like Nigeria.

As I write today, I have mixed feelings. I feed sad that we shed the blood of our FUTURE, our most precious children. On the other hand I feel hopeful that the new government in power will extend its ‘change’ agenda to our precious children. Whether I am right or wrong in my optimism, the next 4 years will tell.

I have written this sober piece today to enlist you as the voice of the voiceless Nigerian child. I charge you to begin to hold government accountable according to your areas of influence and expertise in the areas identified above and more. Let us make it a point of duty to compare notes in the next 4 years. There can’t be any onlooker in this matter. According to Fanon, ‘every  onlooker is either a coward or a traitor.’ If we do not speak up for the child today, we betray his trust, destiny and above all, our conscience. We simply forgot that these abandoned children will make this country insecure and ungovernable for our protected children today and tomorrow. According to Martin Luther King Jnr, ‘injustice anywhere is a threat to justice everywhere. We forget that a nation, which shed the blood of its own future will be judged, because the blood of the innocent will cry out for justice and when judgment comes, every onlookers shall be judged as collaborators because silence means consent to the shedding of the blood of our precious.

I think I should sign out here with the instructive words of Nelson Mandela that ‘there is no keener revelation of a society’s soul than the way it treats its children.’ It therefore means if we are serious about CHANGE as a people and government, it must begin with the way we treat our precious children and how we respond rapidly to the dire state of the Nigerian child today.

I am Taiwo Akinlami and I am sober on my knees on this LORD’S Day.