ADDRESSING THE 21ST CENTURY CAREGIVER AND ENTITLEMENT MENTALITY SYNDROME(1)

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#ThisisMyStory

#ThisisMyJourney

#ThisisMyLessons

Dateline was Friday, March 29, 2019, The Preacher was invited to Lagos State Education District 1 to speak to all the school counsellors in the district…The Subject Matter was counseling the 21st Century Children.

As I spoke and got into the spirit and elements of my presentation, consumed by the zeal of the message the Lord sent me, I found myself addressing the challenges of working with children as counsellors in the 21st Century. Quoting W.B. Yeats, “the Falcon cannot hear the Falconer… Things fall apart..the centre cannot hold mere anarchy is loosed upon the world,’ I posited the precious African children are the falcons and their caregivers are the falconers. I further stated that the challenge is that the falconers are speaking but the Falcon are not hearing.It therefore means that there is a communication breakdown between the Falcons and Falconers. Alas, the Falconers neither understand nor speak the language of the Falcons. The Falcons have created their own world and language codes and the Falconers have not sought to be initiated into into that world. The Falconers live in the Falcons’ world, with the expired language codes brought from their own world. The Falconers are aliens in the world of the Falcons, insisting on their language in another man’s land.
The real crisis of the 21st century is not the difficulties or complexities that we see discuss and adumbrate.The real issue is lack of capacity on the part of the caregivers to provide direction in a way that today’s young people can understand, appreciate and accept.
Unfortunately we are not even aware of what the real problem is. We have succeeded in calling this problems many names: today’s children are stubborn, they are full of their ways, they are too opinionated, their undue exposure to technology and internet has made them less receptive to opinions and instructuon of their caregivers.
What we fail to pay attention to is that these precious young people are growing up in a digital age. It is called the information age where everything happens at the speed of thought. They live perpetually on the fast lane of life, since the day of thei birth. It is important to note here that fast lane, as used here does not imply impatient or lack of commitment to processes. It means we are in the Fourth Industrial Revolution. According to Wikipedia 4IR is summed up thus: ‘it is characterized by a fusion of technologies that is blurring the lines between the physical, digital and biological spheres, collectively referred to as cyber-physical systems.’ Fast lane here means faster ways of doing all things. Unknown to the caregivers of today, every revolution comes with its own culture and it’s language, which is designed to be the vehicle of the culture.
While our precious children are digital natives by their births and socialization, we their caregivers are digital aliens. By our history and socialization, we are analogues in our thinking and deeds. By the implications of the foregoing, we live in the slow lane of life, except we consciously debrief ourselves of the impact of our history.
The challenge today is that SLOW ANALOGUE MINDS are trying to control the affairs of today ‘SMART’ MINDS,’ our precious young people.
We today’s caregivers and our precious young people live in same world but our cultures and orientations; THE ANALOGUE CULTURE and DIGITAL CULTURE. So what it took to be a caregiver in the 20th century is not what it takes to be a caregiver today.
Yet we suffer from what I refer to THE CAREGIVERS ENTITLEMENT MENTALITY(CEM). The lead symptom of this insidious Mentality is our belief that we deserve and must command the cooperation and obidience of today’s precious young people just because we are their primary and secondary caregivers. This Mentality robs us of the reality that until me move from being CAREGIVERS/DUTY BEARERS to becoming STANDARDS BEARERS, who learn, understand, accept and are established in the reality that we live in a changed and fast changing world with its own culture, we will not make sense to our precious children. Yet these precious ones are in search of directions in a very complicated and complex world. The Mentality has robbed us of the simple fact that we are saddled by God of the responsibility to help our precious young people solve the convoluted riddles that mark the 21st century life. To this Mentality, we are losing grounds and our place as STANDARDS BEARERS.
We still live in the old world. The CAREGIVERS ENTITLEMENT MENTALITY keeps us archaic in our thinking and actions and omissions. We believe that since our parents winked at us to communicate with us growing up, same must apply to this age and the way we communicate with our children.
Alas there is a failure to study the 21st century child .We still largely rely on native intelligence to guide us in navigating the murky and sophisticated waters of raising or instructing children in the 21st century. This is the bad news; IT CANNOT WORK..
There is a good news and that is what works and that I will share by God’s grace tomorrow and the role that our #SAFE4MEMovement and our medium, our monthly comic, #SAFEVille.
Do have an INSPIRED weekend.
Yours IN THE BEST INTEREST OF THE PRECIOUS AFRICAN CHILD,
Taiwo AKINLAMI
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ONE DAY…ONE MESSAGE…ONE MISSION…TWO MISSIONARY JOURNEYS

#ThisisMyStory

#ThisisMyJourney
#ThisisMyLesson
Dateline was Wednesday, April 10, 2019 and I, The Preacher was on my 3rd Missionary Journey to Apata Memorial School, Isolo, Lagos to speak at the Parents Forum of the highly esteemed institution of learning. My fellow Preacher and dearly beloved wife, Oluwafunmilayo AKINLAMI was on another Missionary Journey to Ikorodu to speak to the gathering of precious young people, who gathered under the platform of Read & Lead Potential Resources
So, ONE DAY, TWO MISSIONARY JOURNEYS and we disseminated ONE MESSAGE and ONE MISSION…What is the MESSAGE? It is time for us to encourage and empower our precious African young people to SHOW UP… STAND OUT…SHOW OFF…
The MISSION is to raise a new generation of precious young people, who are aware and empowered SHOW UP to play their inevitable roles in their PERSONAL SAFETY and SELF-PROTECTION, triumphing over the complexities of the 21st century… STAND OUT to take timely advantage the innumerable opportunities of the 21st century and SHOW OFF the the priceless dividends of living according to POSITIVE VALUE SYSTEM
Our MISSION both in Isolo and Ikorodu and every where we go is to Dim the light on complexities and shine the light on the opportunities of the 21st for the precious African young people
Yes, we are in the information age,..the fast lane where every bad, good and ugly infirmation is just a click away, where every substance has the propensity to be abused as a stimulant and the internet has compressed the world into an open global space without borders.
This is the 21st century in our precious children are being raised.Yes, no doubt, the complexities are many and I must say this is not the easiest time to raise children or to be children.
However as solution minded people, we must DELIBERATELY DIM THE LIGHT ON THE COMPLEXITIES and ILLUMINATE THE OPPORTUNITIES that so abound, guiding our precious children into the abundantly existing opportunities.
Permit us to submit that our world is tired of good mannered children without any modicum impact or aspirations to do great things.
This is our commitment at the #SAFE4MEMOVEMENTand this was our message to both at Isolo and Ikorodu yesterday.
At Apata Memorial Schools, many parents were enlisted in the process of teaching children the right values when they invested massively in the SAFEVille, our monthly comic.
The train of the revolution is on and no one, who understands the signs of the time must be left behind…One single sign of commitment to the revolution is to order and subscribe to our monthly comic, SAFEVille and enlist your precious young ones in the noble MISSION to SHOW UP…STAND OUT and SHOW OFF… Please don’t put aside this piece until you place that order of subscription…It is just a DM away.
Do have an INSPIRED week STANDARDS BEARERS.
Yours IN THE BEST INTEREST OF THE PRECIOUS AFRICAN CHILD,
Taiwo AKINLAMI

THAT TVC Interview on Reading CULTURE in Nigeria

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ThisisMyStory
#ThisisMyJourney
#ThisisMyLesson

So TVC News was at our S.A.F.E™ Haven, Lagos to interview The Preacher. Subject of discussion was demise of reading culture in our society today.

I was asked why I write and I responded that writing is one of the ways by which you extend yourself and the message you carry in your lifetime and beyond.

To another question on why I think our young people do not read. I responded by saying that reading, research and development are ventures that are neither sparingly not handsomely rewarded. Whatever a society rewards,it encourages and whatever it encourages, it multiplies and whatever it multiplies becomes the dominant behaviour in the society.

As a society, we have so much respect for certificate and not necessarily the KNOWLEDGE, SKILLS and ATTITUDE it claims to confer. We are crazy about titles but not substance. We have a form of intellectualism but deny the POWER and the PRODUCTIVITY thereof.

It is The Preacher’s submission today that we must change the tide of pseudo intellectualism and embrace the revolution of KNOWLEDGE, SKILLS and ATTITUDE, undergirded by POSITIVE VALUE SYSTEM.

We must start this revolution with our precious young people encouraging, empowering them to SHOW UP… STAND OUT and SHOW OFF…

We do not think there is a better way to be part of the life of our precious young people today than to help them to navigate the opportunities and complexities of the 21st than to empower them to access and annex the opportunities and triumph over the complexities…

That is the message of our #SAFE4MEMovement #SAFE4MEEncounter and #SAFEVille, our monthly comic. Thus ,we urge you to be part of the movement by signing up for our #SAFEVille Comic. And there is no better time to do that than today… RIGHT NOW…

Do have an INSPIRED day, Dear STANDARDS BEARERS.

Yours IN THE BEST INTEREST OF THE PRECIOUS AFRICAN CHILD,

Taiwo AKINLAMI

SAFE4MEEncounter Leading A Counter-Culture in the BEST INTEREST OF THE PRECIOUS AFRICAN CHILD (3)

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#ThisisMyStory
#ThisisMyJourney
#ThisisMyLesson

Happy New Week to you all dear STANDARDS BEARERS. Sure you had a great weekend.

I hope you have found the last two installments of this series worthy of the time invested so far.

Honestly speaking, it was none of my intention to drag this discussion this far. I must have actually underrated how deep this message has taken root in me. Please pardon this long post, which has come to you in three long parts.

At IVY Premier College, Mushin and Queen’s College last Thursday, we taught the precious young people to SHOW UP, STAND OUT and SHOW OFF as the precursor to taking responsibility for their PERSONAL SAFETY and SELF-PROTECTION.

The soul of this message is that you are never protected by rules and regulations… NEVER!!! You are only protected by who you are and who you are is the value system, exhibited in your habits. It means by your values you are protected and by your values you are unsafe.

Another important anchor of the message is that complexities of the 21st century have become intimidating threats to both young and old from the Third World to the First World and the only visible safe haven is one’s personal POSITIVE VALUE SYSTEM. This you must endeavour to deliberately define and develop. This undertaking does not also wait for the day of adversity. Personal POSITIVE VALUE SYSTEM is worked at in the day of less pressure for the day of intense pressure. The Holy Writ says ‘if you fail in the day of adversity, your strength is little.’

We showed these precious young people that the complexities of the 21st Century and it’s dire challenges, which is further intensified by the diactates of the Fourth Industrial Revolution are as strong in their impact on them as the weakness of their value system and as weak as the strength of the their character.

By introducing them to POSITIVE VALUE SYSTEM, we also shift their attention from everything that is going wrong like drug and substance use and abuse, sexual immorality and abuse, violence and bullying, terrorism, addictions of any and all kinds. We focus their attention on the opportunities inherent in the 21st Century and how to access same through the right behaviour and thinking. We believe that when our precious young people get to be exposed to the opportunities inherent in the 21st Century and they shown how to access same, the evils of the century will become less and less attractive to them. We helped them to understand that it may very well be difficult times to be a young people, it is much more the best time to be a young person because the opportunities inherent in the Fourth Industrial Revolution are countless and POSITIVE VALUE SYSTEM is the MASTER KEY.

To SHOW UP means to be faithful in their duty post in life, to STAND OUT means to be outstanding in your duty post in life and SHOW OFF is to be an ambassador of POSITIVE HABITS, which are children of POSITIVE VALUE SYSTEM.

This is the message in a nutshell. #ThisisMyStory that those precious young people leaped with palpable joy at the hope inherent in the message. We believe we unlocked their curiosity for good… #ThisisMyJourney that we move from one Child Focused Organisation to the other spreading the message to the glory of God Almighty and #ThisisMyLesson that to change the world of our precious young people and help them to be BENEFICIARIES of the opportunities of the 21st Century instead of being victims is a possibility if we try to change the tide of the prevailing and popular message of PARANOIA and embrace a COUNTER CULTURE, undergirded with the BEST INTEREST OF THE PRECIOUS AFRICAN CHILD in the 21st century.

We look forward to being your guest soon, exposing the PRECIOUS young people under your watch and care to the exponentially beneficial message of the #SAFE4MEMovement through our #SAFE4MEEncounter or you may want to subscribe and expose them to our monthly comic, #SAFEVille.

The revolution is here…Who will stand up and be counted in the BEST INTEREST OF THE PRECIOUS AFRICAN CHILD.

Do have an INSPIRED week dear STANDARDS BEARERS.

Yours IN THE BEST INTEREST OF THE PRECIOUS AFRICAN CHILD,
Taiwo AKINLAMI
The Preacher

#SAFE4MEEncounter  Leading A Counter-Culture in the Best Interest of The Precious African Child (2)

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ThisisMyStory #ThisisMyJourney #ThisisMyLesson

Sure today has been great this LORD’S DAY.

I am here to try to bring closure to the conversation I began yesterday and if for whatever reason I am not able to, tomorrow is another day.

The mission of our NGO, Securing A Friendly and PROTECTIVE Environment™ for Children is to represent and present to Africa a COUNTER CULTURE in the best interest of the precious African child. We are not critics of the present culture of the way we SEE and TREAT our precious evolving glories, our children. We have however recognised the inherent and almost incurable loopholes in our CULTURE (Dominant Value System) that we have decided to ENVISION, and LEAD a COUNTER CULTURE as a mission of a LIFETIME.

‘A way of life and set of ideas that are completely different from those accepted by most of society, or the group of people,’ So explains the English Dictionary and we verily agree. We have chosen not be an echoe of the present popular but unproductive culture, whose strength is not research and development but unverified claims of those it has raised or erased as the case may be. We are proud to be a voice of a COUNTER CULTURE, committed spirit, souls and body to nothing but the best interest of the precious African and the implications of same on emergence of a new Africa, where our precious children become our number one priority in all things.

The creed of this COUNTER CULTURE is what we have tagged, POSITVE VALUE SYSTEM? What is this POSITVE VALUE SYSTEM? It is simply appealing to our basic sense of what is right or wrong, first according to common sense and second according to obvious moral code of human existence and interactions, with a commitment to always carefully consider all of the consequences of our actions and omission to self, immediate family, community and the world at large before embarking or omitting to embark on same.

Considering the consequences of our actions and omissions is not an exercise in wishful thinking. It demands guadiance and such guadiance demands research and fact finding, considering the complexities of the century we have found ourselves. No CULTURE and it’s practices are worth upholding any more because of its age and popular appeal. Whatever we must uphold must be as a result of its FRUITS and how do you know if a practice is FRUITFUL if it is not consistently and deliberately passed through the process of monitoring and evaluation.

So one of the tools of disseminating this POSITIVE VALUE SYSTEM is our #SAFE4MEEncounter under our #SAFE4MEMovement. Between IVY Premier College, Mushin and Queen’s College, Yaba we reached over 600 hundred precious young people and also gave out copies of our new monthly comic, #SAFEVille.

We shared with these precious young people the theme of our 2018 #SAFE4MEConference, SHOW UP, STAND OUT, SHOW OFF… What exactly did we tell these precious young people? What does it mean to SHOW UP for their own PERSONAL SAFETY and SELF-PROTECTION? What does it mean for them to STAND OUT and how do they SHOW OFF?

I think we should leave bringing closure to this conversation till tomorrow God’s willing. Do have an INSPIRED week dear STANDARDS BEARERS.

Yours IN THE BEST INTEREST OF THE PRECIOUS AFRICAN CHILD,

Taiwo AKINLAMI

The Preacher

#SAFE4MEEncounter Leading A Counter-Culture in the Best Interest of The Precious African Child (1)

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ThisisMyStory #ThisisMyJourney #ThisisMyLesson

On Thursday, 4, 2019 I set out with two members of our team of volunteers, Ola Kazeem and Elizabeth Azubuike from our S.A.F.E™ Haven Lagos.
The mission was to take the #SAFE4MEEncounter under the #SAFE4MEMovement of our NGO, SAFE for Children Society. Our goal is to be in at least one school a month.
We had two destinations in mind. The first was IVY Premier College, Mushin and Queen’s College, Yaba.
Top on our mind is a commitment to engage these precious young ones for the sole purpose of empowering them and helping them to take responsibility for their inevitable roles in their PERSONAL SAFETY and SELF-PROTECTION. Our tool is simply POSITIVE VALUE SYSTEM orientation or reorientation.
The complexities of the 21st Century are not about to decrease…The truth is that despite all that we have seen, we have not seen anything yet. The only solution that works is for to accept in the words of Olakunle SORIYAN that what will come will come but it is who we are that makes all the difference.
It is not an easy time to be a child or young person. The distractions are here in their legions and the Fourth Industrial Revolution has crashed all bothers. Therefore, both prepared and unprepared societies are face with same realities. Of course, the victims are the unprepared Third World nation, particularly Africa, who seems to be left behind in all things except mediocrity.
Unfortunately, instead of us to empathize with today’s troubled and abandoned young people, we bash them, accuse them and denigrate them in the name of discipline. We do not know that whatever we don’t like and complain of in our precious young ones today, we are the ones who put them there. We fail very woefully to accept this reality that our precious children and young people are either victims and beneficiaries of our dominant examples. We forget that a society will forever deserve the kind of children they raise.
Alas, there is an evil I have seen under the sun. An African continent seeks to reap where we have not sown. We seek to place demands on our precious children where we have not invested in their POSITIVE VALUE SYSTEM in words and indeed. Laughably, a society with a CULTURE OF DISCIPLINE, celebrated or silent seeks from her precious children a disciplined lifestyle. Yet the society does not really know what it seeks. Cannot define what discipline means as of old and as of now and how same is inculcated. This this is part of a piece for another conversation. I just found this point relevant to this discussion this day.
Empathy is what our precious young people demand to navigate the labrythine journey to adulthood
Our mission is clear, we cannot continue to complain about what we permit, in the words of Mike Murdock; we cannot also continue to define the problem we must decide it… That is the mission of our NGO, #SAFE4MEMovement and all of its channels of expressions, including #SAFEEncounter and our monthly comic, #SAFEVille.
Tomorrow, I will continue this piece, sharing what we mean by counter-culture, POSITIVE VALUE SYSTEM and the details of what we shared at IVY Premier College and QC where we reached out to over 600 Precious young people.
Do have an INSPIRED weekend.
Yours in THE BEST INTEREST OF THE PRECIOUS AFRICAN CHILD,
Taiwo AKINLAMI
The Preacher

The Premier Skills/British Council Child Protection Journey

#ThisisMySTORY #ThisisMyLesson

Dateline was May 2014 when I received an email from Stephanie Delaney, who resided in Egypt and headed Child Protection affairs of the British Council for Africa and the Middle East. I had met her earlier that year in South Africa, while running a refresher course on School Leadership under the Connecting Classrooms program of the British Council.

Stephanie had contacted me to develop Training and Facilitators’ Manuals on Rights and Protection for the girl child under the Premier Skills Project.

Stephanie had Linked me to work with Roy Chikwen, then Project Manager, Education and Society for the British Council.

I had been given 30 days to develop a total of 12 modules of Training Manual and 12 modules of Facilitators’ Manual…It was a tough order but I accepted same as a challenge that could be surmounted, with the right mindset, proportional and deliberate activities and love and passion for the PRECIOUS AFRICAN children. It was my second attempt of trying my hands on curriculum development on Child’s Rights/Protection, having worked with UNICEF between 2006 and 2009 to mainstream Child’s Rights Education into the curriculum of the Nigerian Institute of Journalism(NIJ) Lagos at all levels (graduate and post graduate.)

By the grace of God the manuals were delivered to the unreserved satisfaction of the British Council…I also ran a 2-day training for the coaches/trainers on how to effectively disseminate the training…

Roy Chikwen invited me back in 2015 to use the Facilitators’Manual to train some NGOS, being engaged by the British Council on the Premier Skills Project.

In 2017, I worked with the Premier Skills trainers from the UK to deliver the local components of the Child Protection training of the Premier Skills. There I met Chikam Ekeh, Project Manager, School, Education and Society.

In 2018 November, the Premier Skills School Club kicked off and now(2019) I have been invited to conduct a Monitoring and Evaluation and Training on the Child Protection component of the project in Lagos and Kano. This time around I was privileged to work with my darling wife and fellow Preacher, big in mind, strong in strength and reliable in all professional and love matters…While I handled Lagos, she handled Kano.

Here is the main lesson for us, the best of organisations, who work with children and we have been privileged to work with over the years, do not take Securing A Friendly and PROTECTIVE ENVIRONMENT™ for granted…They have comes to accept as an inevitable operating principle that until Children FEEL safe, they do not give the best of themselves to any form of activities they are involved or engaged in…Having accepted the foregoing, they are always working to keep the precious children under their care safe. How do they do that? They create Securing A Friendly and PROTECTIVE ENVIRONMENT™systems and a critical component of the systems is Monitoring and Evaluation. The system is codified into an implementation policy. You cannot come in contact with children under their watch without being informed or trained on their Securing A Friendly and PROTECTIVE ENVIRONMENT™ for Systems and Policy. They work with Subject Matter Experts(SME) and instist on the best outputs, embracing global STANDARDS as key component of the entire operations.

For them, Securing A Friendly and PROTECTIVE ENVIRONMENT™ for the PRECIOUS children under their care is not an affair in window dressing, it is the heart of their continued existence and the foundation of all they do.

It is our earnest expectations that Nigeria, Africa and her privte and public institutions will truly embrace as inevitable systems of Securing A Friendly and PROTECTIVE ENVIRONMENT™ for the precious children under their care, noting that the devil of abuse is in the details we neglect…

Do have an INSPIRED day dear STANDARDS BEARERS.

Yours IN THE BEST INTEREST OF THE PRECIOUS AFRICAN CHILD

Taiwo AKINLAMI
The Preacher