THE S.A.F.E SCHOOL OF STANDARDS: FINDING THE AFRICAN CHILD AND HIS/HER LOST INTERESTS

The child is always in the midst of many interests. There is hardly anyone who comes into the life of the child without an interest.

The challenge I have seen however is that many of our interests in the child, particularly in Africa, hardly include the interests of the child.

I think there is a new exclusions we need to begin to discuss:
a.we exclude the child from our interests in him/her
b. we exclude the child in deciding our interests for the child.

We have these arrogant assumptions that we know what the interest of the child is and we can always represent same.

I have also noticed that it is characteristic of the African caregivers to conform the child to his/her Interests. Often, primary and secondary caregivers have diverse and divergent Interests. Institutions, like schools and religious places of worship has interests. Since the Interests of these handlers are never conceived and executed in uniformity, the child becomes an unfortunate recipient of cacophony of interests to which every of his/her handler demands compliance. The child is now cut between many diverse and divergent Interests, being peddled by those who are in primary and secondary authority over his/her life. The result of this difficult experience for the child is that he/she wants to comply with all the interests, since all the handlers advancing them have one form of authority or the other. The attempt to comply to all interests leads the child to develop multiple personalities. From there, he/she becomes confused about his/her identity and frustration defines his/her existence.

I have also noticed that primary and secondary caregivers do not communicate their interests to the child through reasoning with the child. It is forced down the throat of the child. We always forget that the child is a reasoning being and force does not achieve anything with him/her, except pretence, fear, trepidation and rebellion.

I have also found that interests of caregivers change from time to time. For instance, the interests of couples in children when they live together in holy matrimony often change when they are separated or divorced. The child, who is never the cause of the change in marital status is not only expected to conform to the new interests as if he/she is a machine with no human feelings, he/she is forced to conform. This is done without any expressed regrets or apology to the child.

Here is the dilemma of the child, who is born with all of his/her interests is that the interests of the caregivers are not in conformity with his/her’s and yet their interests are being foisted on him.

Another thing we do is that when the child makes an attempt to find and give expression to his/her interests, we look down on same, particularly where it is not a popular interest and we force them through all forms of bizarre treatments to stop expressing such interests.

The foregoing experiences constitute nothing but an anihilation of the essence of the child. It is in fact a very tragic experience for the child. As far as the child is concerned, it is better for him/her to die than to live and be stipped of all his/her interests.

I was a child, whose handlers never care to find out not to talk of respect his interests. For example, I was published for expressing my interest in talking. My name was in the list of noisemakers and disturbers everyday and every week respectively. The noisemakers were canned in class before their classmates but the disturbers were canned on the Monday morning assembly before the entire school.

The gift of talking that needed to be managed was demonized and qualified for public disgrace and exorcism.

Between exclusion and diverse and divergent interests of caregivers/handlers the child’s interest is lost. Once the interest of the child is lost, it probably takes a lifetime for the child to find it, he/he ever does.

Yet every child is born with his/her unique interests, installed by the creator.

What exactly do I mean by interests of children? What are the subjective and objective components of these interests? What do refer to as THE BEST INTEREST OF THE CHILD?

How do we as handlers recognise these unique interests?

At what age do we begin to watch out for the interests of our precious children?

What tools do we use in this expedition of deliberately recognising the interests of our precious children?

How do we nurture the interests into maturity for the benefits of the child, his/her immediately family and humanity as a whole?

How do we include our precious children in recognising and building their interests?

I, The Preacher will answer all of these questions at our S.A.F.E™ School of STANDARDS, earlier slated for February 23, 2019 but has to be postponed now that the election has claimed the date.

A new date will be communicated later… Please watch out and watch this space.

Do have an INSPIRED week.
Yours IN THE BEST INTEREST OF THE CHILD,
Taiwo AKINLAMI
The Preacher
http://www.taiwoakinlamiblog.com
2348033620843

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NOW THAT THE HYMEN IS BROKEN

Today I give you my hymen,
It is all yours to break.
It is the celebration of our love,
Red love,
Blood love,
Let us stain your bed or mine with the blood from mine;
For this love cannot wait,
For if it must be called love, it must be hot,
Love is best engaged when it is hot,
For soon it may get cold and cake.
This is love in the fourth Industrial Revolution,
It waits for no one,
This love is fast,
This love is furious.

Are you quiet my loved one?
I have brought my hymen on platter,
It is a platter of gold,
No price to pay,
No persuasion to invent or invest,
Now, I believe all that you once told me:
Broke hymen is the insignia of love,
The Fourth Industrial Revolution love.
This is from me to you,
Asking you to make me a woman as you have always promised,
Do it this very day that love hovers in the air.
Make it memorable for me my loved one,
Please don’t let me go same way I came.

It is over?!
Just like that?!
Where is the woman in me?
I mean the woman I wanted you to make me?
Where is our love and it’s hotness?
Why has everything gone so cold, very cold?
And you too why are you now cold, my loved one?
Is this the memorable moments I seek?
Of guilt, shame, emptiness and withdraws and their syndromes?
My loved one, where are you, your promises of heaven on earth?
Did you not tell me, loved one:
‘your hymen, once broken for me, opens you up to my heart and the heavens therein?
Where is heaven?
Where is hell?
Where is earth?
Where is your heart?

My soul is in tears
My bed is drenched,
This is same bed where the blood of my dignity was shed and surrendered to the popular foolishness of the times.

No!
It is not over,
I will not be quiet,
My story, I will tell like a redeemed parrot,
That today’s young ones may learn,
Even in the Fourth Industrial Revolution,
There is still dignity in sanity,
There is honour in purity;
Marriage is still honourable when the bed is not defiled before the ‘yes-I-do’ date.

Happy Valentine’s Day

The Preacher
(C) Taiwo AKINLAMI 2019
http://www.taiwoakinlamiblog.com

CARE: STANDARD is Superior to GOOD INTENTIONS, GOOD SPIRITEDNESS and KINDHEARTEDNESS

Few years ago my darling wife had a car crash on Third Mainland Bridge. Her car, in which she had two children from her school summersaulted. Good Samaritans rushed to the scene of the near fatal accident and they wanted to turn the car back to its normal position before bringing out the occupants. My dear wife, who is trained in paramedics, shouted with all of her strength from inside the summersaulted car, pleading with these good spirited Nigerians not to turn the car. She knew the consequences. Turning the car with the occupants there may now make a near fatal accident now become fatal.

Now, think with me:

1. For people to see an accident on Third Mainland Bridge and stopped to help, they are obviously kind and good spirited Nigerian.

2. Does their kindheartedness and good spiritedness confer on them the knowledge and skill of what to do and in which order?

3. If my dear wife did not know better, would their good intentions have saved the day?

4. Would the fact that they meant well change the dynamics for the best interest of the traumatized occupants of the car, if they had done the wrong thing?

That is the point… STANDARDS answer all things when it comes to CARE…It is CARE by all STANDARDS NECESSARY.

When we lack knowledge, skill and attitude in matters of STANDARS, our good intentions, kindheartedness, good spiritedness and commitment in Securing A Friendly and PROTECTIVE Environment™ for the precious African child may further put them in serious danger. We would have meant well but lack of understanding of STANDARDS would have neutralised all of our best intentions.

On Saturday, February 23 at Chrisland School, Ladipo Oluwole, off Adeniyi Jones, our S.A.F.E™ School of STANDARDS will hold, addressing STANDARDS and DOMESTICATION/CONTEXTUALISATION of same…

It is FRESH and NEW…It is BEYOND IMAGINATION, the contents you shall be exposed to.

You cannot afford to miss it if you are free on that day and you represent the BEST INTEREST OF THE CHILD as both primary and secondary caregivers.

It is a free event but registration is required to enable us plan for your attendance…Registration details are on the attached handbill and help spread the word.

Do have an INSPIRED day

CARE BY ALL STANDARDS NECESSARY!

I was called to the Nigerian Bar 21 years ago and I have dedicated the entirety of my practice life to Social Development and Public Interest…

My flagship project is Securing A Friendly and PROTECTIVE Environment™ for the precious African child.

I have had the privilege of working with the best of Organisations as Social Development Lawyer, Thought Leader, Contents/Curriculum Development. UNICEF, UNFPA, the British Council, USAID, SOS Children’s Viilage International, APEN, NAPPS, AISEN are some of the organisations that found my contents worth their investment consistently…

One of the greatest gains of my association with these international bodies and my 21 years of practice in the field of Social Development Legal Practice is their commitment to CARE through STANDARDS…I have come to accept except through STANDARDS, CARE cannot be provided for our precious children…. STANDARDS involves ENVISIONING, DESIGNING, PLANNING and PROVIDING CARE and embracing SYSTEMS, codified into a working POLICY…

I have acquinted myself with humanitarian principles like Do no harm/Do less harm, Humanity, Neutrality and Impartiality and I have found the these principles cannot be respected in our claim to provide CARE as primary and secondary caregivers without a deliberate commitment to learning what STANDARDS of CARE is…

I have also found that the challenge with us in Nigeria is that we neither know what STANDARDS are nor how to embrace same…It is interesting to note that everyone destroying the child today claims to be providing CARE…In fact they may be sincere in their claim…But does their sincerity cancel their errors or the impact of same on our precious children? CAPITAL NO!

2019 is our year of CARE by ALL STANDARDS Necessary and on February 23, 2019 I will be speaking at the S.A.F.E™ School of STANDARS…Don’t miss it…Follow the information on the handbill…It is FREE but registration is compulsory. Do have an INSPIRED week.

The S.A.F.E™ School of STANDARDS™

CARE by all STANDARDS Necessary

Change Pilgrimage

In 1997, Taiwo AKINLAMI set out to pioneer in Nigeria and arguably, African, a Social Empowerment Advocacy, focusing on Child Rights and Responsibilities, CARE and Protection, Childhood PRESERVATION and Family Strengthening.

His commitment is informed by his own personal story, which he captures and summarizes as, ‘ERASED Childhood (0-18), EMPTY young Adulthood (18-27) and CHANGE Pilgrimage (27 till date).’

Having recorded resounding turnaround, tremendous and seeming impossible change in his personal, after surrendering his life to Christ and began to discover and practice certain universal principles of personal change, Akinlami was compelled to democratize these principles, which have transformed his life. Thus he often refer to himself as the guinea pig in his own laboratory of change.

Journey into Best Practice

Taiwo AKINLAMI in his 21(twenty-one) years of Social Interventions of Securing A Friendly and PROTECTIVE Environment™ for the precious African children has been exceptionally privileged to consult, train and provide contents for leading local and international Child-Focused Organizations (CFOs) like UNICEF, the British Council, SOS Children’s Village International, UNFPA, USAID, Child Frontiers, just to mention a few.

Discovery of STANDARDS AS THE KEY TO CARE

One of his greatest and most priceless discoveries, having been exposed to international best practice in the area of Securing A Friendly and PROTECTIVE Environment™ for the precious African child is that except primary and secondary caregivers and practitioners accept that care for children at both private and public levels are impossible without embracing global standards of care, the best of their efforts only become counterproductive and a huge disservice to the precious children they claim to provide or design care for.

CALL TO INEVITABILITY OF STANDARDS

The foregoing discovery has led him to conclude that primary and secondary caregivers and practitioners must make deliberate efforts to find, understand, accept and embrace the standards they must put in place to provide and design care for the precious children under their care. The advocated standards of care must be in accordance with global requirements of providing and designing care for them to make a difference in our interventions.

The REAL Definition of CARE IS STANDARDS

It is Taiwo AKINLAMI’s conclusion from his wealth of experience that the real definition of care is STANDARDS.

Akinlami has further argued that when the design and provision of CARE does not embrace global STANDARD of care as a prerequisite, it is nothing but giving MENTAL NOTICE to the design and provision care for our precious children. MENTAL NOTICE of According to him, MENTAL NOTICE is neither deliberate nor purposeful; it is an accidental affair, often authored by circumstances not within our control either by virtues of our ignorance or negligence. These are efforts that are not initiated and pursued with a SENSE OF MISSION.

It is Akinlami’s postulation that when we the design and provision of CARE is predicated on STANDARDS, it results to paying ACTUAL NOTICE to the CARE of our precious children. According to him, ACTUAL NOTICE speaks of conscious and deliberate efforts of caregivers, initiated and pursued with a SENSE OF MISSION, aided with KNOWLEDGE (what to do), SKILL (how to do) and ATTITUDE (fortitude to do), aimed at achieving adequate CARE for the precious children under our care.

CARE according to STANDARDS

It is Taiwo AKINLAMI’s final analysis that CARE in this context is to anticipate the needs and threats to the precious child under our CARE and make adequate provisions, according to GLOBAL STANDARDS to meet the anticipated needs and mitigate the threats well before they arise.

STANDARDS, SYSTEM’S APPROACH, POLICY and CULTURE

For CARE to be designed and provided through STANDARDS, Akinlami has further postulated that the processes must as a matter of prerequisite embrace SYSTEM’S APPROACH and the SYSTEM’S APPROACH only becomes ACTIONABLE when it is CODIFIED into a POLICY, on which every stakeholder within the space of the private and public institutions, designing and providing care are trained and retrained, with sole aim of establishing and entrenching STANDARDS as a CULTURE (DOMINAT VALUE SYSTEM).

Akinlami defines SYSTEM’S APPROACH as CAREFULLY identifying or recognizing EVERY STAKEHOLDER, including THE CHILDREN, in Securing A Friendly and PROTECTIVE Environment™ for our precious children, ENLIGHTENING, EMPOWERING and ORGANIZING them towards CREATING AND STRENGTHENING PROTECTIVE ENVIRONMENT and PROVIDING SUITABLE and SUSTAINABLE SERVICES DELIVERY.

The foregoing efforts only become operational from rich and purposeful interaction of stakeholders, aimed at Securing A Friendly and PROTECTIVE Environment™ for our precious children, as provided by LEGAL INSTRUMENTS, POLICIES, CUSTOMS and TRADITIONS, which set the formal and informal frameworks for Securing A Friendly and PROTECTIVE Environment™ for our precious children, upholding THE BEST INTEREST OF THE CHILD as the operating system.

Akinlami’s postulation is summed up thus: CARE is defined by STANDARDS, STANDARDS are defined by SYSTEM, SYSTEM is defined by POLICY, POLICY is defined by EMPOWERMENT and EMPOWERMENT establishes and entrenches STANDARDS as a CULTURE for the design and provision of CARE.

VOODOO DEMOCRACY…VOODOO JUSTICE!

I use the word voodoo here in the following context that I found in Urban Dictionary, ‘an unexplainable occurrence…a noun that describes situations that are strange, weird, odd or out of the ordinary.’

I had the privilege of being called to the Nigerian bar in September 1999 and I have made it a point of duty to pitch my tent as a legal practitioner in the area of law and public interest. The core of the organisation I lead today is Legal Enlightenment and Social Development and our flagship project is Securing A Friendly and PROTECTIVE Environment™ for the precious African child through global STANDARDS.

I accept wholly that law is an instrument of social change…The law is the foundation of modern society. It was by the Rule of Law that the Rule of Force was displaced and flunged far away into the sea of forgetfulness and it’s oppressively destructive spirit was exorcised from civilised society.

I also verily believe that the law rules all things. The implication of the foregoing sentence is that every private and public action and omission of private individuals and public officers must by all means necessary follow the letters of the law, even when it is not socially and politically expedient.

DUE PROCESS is the antidote to jungle justice. In the eye of the constitution and our criminal justice system, a man/woman, suspected or accused of a crime is innocent until proven guilty. How do we establish innocence or guilt in law? It by embracing the almighty principle of DUE PROCESS.

The fact in issue today is that the head of the Executive arm of the Federal Government, General Buhari, purportedly acting on the order of a court removed the CJN on the allegation of corrupt practices.

The question today is: has the president followed DUE PROCESS in suspending the CJN? The answer is CAPITAL NO! There are laid down constitutional procedures to follow in removing a judicial officer…The National Judicial Council has not been involved in this whole process neither is the National Assembly in accordance with the clear provisions of Section 292 of the 1999 Constitution of The Federal Republic of Nigeria(as amended).

Some have argued that how can the National Judicial Council sit over a matter in which it’s chairman(CJN) is the accused? I think the answer is very simple. All that the chairman would do is to recuse himself in accordance with the rule of natural justice. The foregoing is clear in elementary law.

Let us agree without conceding that the head of the executive arm of the Federal Government of Nigeria acted in obedience to a court order and even if same is valid, when did the executive arm of the present government begin to respect court order? It is the character of the present administration to flout court orders with brazen impunity. Does a government with respect for the Rule of Law choose and pick, which court order to obey?

The responsibility to uphold DUE PROCESS is higher on those who swore to uphold the Constitution of the Federal Republic of Nigeria.

The point here is not whether the CJN and the judiciary is corrupt, though I believe it is a valid point to consider under another subject matter…The real questions here are: who is afraid of DUE PROCESS and why?

It was Ghandi who said, :an eye for an eye will only make the world go blind, pointing to the uncivilised nature of jungle justice, under which the executive arm of the Federal Government has sought refuge in this matter…

I smell a fast descent into the abyss of the Rule of Force…

I believe strongly in the saying that all it takes for evil to triumph is for men and women of goodwill to fold their arms and do nothing… According to Martin Luther King Jnr. ‘injustice anywhere is a threat to justice everywhere.’ I think our agitation today must be that the executive arm of the Federal Government must reserve it’s unlawful decision and follow DUE PROCESS or be forced to do so by all legal and peaceful means necessary.

History and posterity remain the unbiased judges of what we do or omit to do in this time of huge moral and national crisis.

Do have an INSPIRED week.
http://www.taiwoakinlamiblog.com