Child’s Rights and Discipline: The Lost Theory (5)

Opening Charge

‘If we prepare the future and we do not prepare our children, the unprepared children will mutilate the prepared future. The truth is that once our children are prepared, they will prepare their own future.  One of the most effective ways to prepare our children for the future is constructive and effective discipline. Please follow me closely as I attempt to do justice to this issue, which is completely misplaced in Africa today.’

I am greatly inspired to be here dear friends. I do not say that as a cliché. I say it as an expression of the conclusion of my conscience. Please believe me and I know that I bring the best of my spirituality, creativity, skill and focus here every day to inspire you to do all in the best interest of the children of Africa.

My wife and I were discussing the matters relating to children at the weekend, which is our common passion. And she shared with me a quote she saw in an institution of learning, which goes, ‘we do not only prepare our children for the future. We also prepare the future for our children.’ The quote caught my attention and spurred some meditation and I found that the child welfare is still at the centre of the future. If we prepare the future and we do not prepare our children, the unprepared children will mutilate the prepared future. The truth is that once our children are prepared, they will prepare their own future.  One of the most effective ways to prepare our children for the future is constructive and effective discipline. Please follow me closely as I attempt to do justice to this issue, which is completely misplaced in Africa today.

I will continue the discussion today by sharing the implication of my childhood abuse, which was believed by my parents to be discipline. You will recall that I shared part of it yesterday. By virtue of the dehumanising nature of the treatment I received from my parents, I had a siege mentality, believing that the whole world was against me. I struggled with acute no-self esteem. I lacked faith in my abilities. In fact, I did not believe I had abilities, thus I wanted to be close to those who I believed were gifted even if they did not want to be close to me. I believe I was made to do everything wrong and could not do anything right. I was addicted to people and would want to please everyone out of fear of rejection. I did not believe I had any view worth expressing.

As an adult I discovered that I could not bear with my frailties as a person, by my childhood experience. I felt that human frailties were signs that ‘you are lesser than a man.’ I did not understand that human frailty is common to all. Thus, I found the manifestation of human frailties embarrassing and attendant correction an attack on my person. I was therefore not comfortable with my mistakes and would sacrifice anything to cover them and look good. The unwritten but yet potent rule was, ‘I must look good by all means at all times.’

I wanted to do everything perfectly and if I made a mistake, I would tremble before the authority over me. I sought what was not a possibility; I sought perfection at work, in relationships and in other areas of life. I also craved to be noticed and commended for anything I did right. It was difficult for me doing any right in secret as it was an abomination for me to do any wrong in the open.

I was not disciplined at all for my future. In fact despite the so-called strictness of my parents, I became a careless adult.

I think I will like to stop here today. Join me tomorrow as I began to share 10 steps that must be taken towards effective discipline of a child. Stay INSPIRED.

I’m Taiwo Akinlami & I Lead the TeacherFIRE™ Revolution

POINT 2 PONDER:

‘As an adult I discovered that I could not bear with my frailties as a person, by my childhood experience. I felt that human frailties were signs that ‘you are lesser than a man.’ I did not understand that human frailty is common to all.’

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