Sometimes last week, the video went viral of 4 year old boy, the same having been filmed and shared by the mother, Mrs. Toluwaloju Lawal
The child in the viral video was seen to be terrified and pleading with the mother to calm down. The mum was heard saying that the child was in the habit of taking whatever he was told not to take.
The governor of Lagos State has ratified the action of the mother.
The implications of the action of the mum are of diverse dimensions. To do justice to it will require a symposium discussion.
Because I have vowed to desist from writing long posts, I will only make few points and leave the rest to you members of this Family Parliament.
First, my idea of what constitutes discipline does not in anyway agree with what I saw in the viral video.
The root word for discipline is to teach and teaching begins with example. Besides, teaching cannot happen without a curriculum and curriculum must draw it’s foundation from the value system of the family. The seriousness of the commitment of the family to their value system is to reduce same to a Family Constitution.
Therefore caning children or threat to cane makes no sense to me and research has shown that it doesn’t work.
So, if I choose to accept, like the majority has accepted that the content of the viral video constitute a type of disciplinary measure, should I also accept that child discipline is no more a private matter?
If the parents do not feel embarrassed or ashamed about this show, does that mean the 4 year old did not? Could it be the reason why the child asked in amazement towards the end of viral video, ‘mummy, what are you doing, are you videoing me?
Could it be that those who argue that the subject of the viral video is just a child, are colossally oblivious of the fact that a child is a person, who has worth as a reasoning being with the power of choice and who begins to feel shame from roughly age 2?
Again, if I choose the path of those who claim that the child was being disciplined, should I also choose to accept that I do not know that the purspose of discipline is to protect and preserve the child’s dignity of human person?
How is the child’s dignity of human person protected when private matters are brought to public domain like it is done in this viral video?
Should I also accept that child discipline should be equated with a public trial in the court of law open to public viewing, when even if the child has attained the age of criminal responsibility and was in conflict with the law, he can not be tried in public under the Child’s Rights Act, 2003?
If it was a querell or disagreement between husband and wife or even older siblings, would it be acceptable for same to be turned into mini reality show to be filmed and beamed to the public?
If it was a querell between two adults or older children that was filmed, as I mentioned above, would our focus be to bring out the smartness and the negotiating power or acting capacity of one of them or the shamefulness of the show of the unnecessary?
If it was a teacher in a school, who recorded and showed on social media, would this be acceptable to the parents and all of us?
It is possible that this video may become an instigator of bullying against the child from his peers, who may nickname him, ‘mummy calm down’ boy like the media is already doing or ‘crying crying crying boy’?
For those who argue that the mother might have recorded the video to show the child in his later years how he was as a child, what would she want to achieve with that? That being a child and behaving like one is strange enough to be a news item to be stored for the future viewing of the child? And if I accept, without conceding that that was the intention of the mum, now that the video is in the public domain, has that purpose as unnecessary at it is, not been defeated?
The mother of the 4 year old alleged in the video that the child was in the habit of touching what he was warned not to touch, should I pretend that I do not know that it is a clear tenet in child protection that whatever you do not want a child to touch you do not put it where the child can reach it?
Are we aware as a society of what constitutes an emotional abuse to a child and that the child does not need to understand or feel the act of emotional abuse for him/her to suffer the immediate and future consequences, which is chiefly dehumanisation?
If we laugh over this matter and say the child was funny, are we aware that though it was funny to us on our interpretation, it was not in anyway, a funny moment for the child, who was in fearful expectation of the mother’s usual judgement?
Could the fact that the child was in fearful expectation of judgement been established by the response of the child in an interview I listened to where the child was asked, ‘is your mother always really angry when she wants to beat you,’ and he responded sharply in the affirmative?
Though, the mother did not beat or record her beating of the child in the viral video, has the interview referred to above not revealed that the mother was in the habit of beating the child and the child was fearful of the same?
Now, that the governor of Lagos State has glorified the act of the mother on his Instagram page and also further publicising the video and reaching out to the family in commendation, which in my humble judgement is not in the best interest of the child, could it be that the Lagos State Ministry of Youth and Social Development and UNICEF need to organise an urgent and basic sensitisation training for the governor and his cabinet members on the issues of Securing A FRIENDLY and PROTECTIVE Environment® for the precious children of Lagos State under the Child’s Rights Law of Lagos State, 2015(as amended)?
Am I not a jobless fellow, asking a lot of questions on a less than 2 minutes video of a mother and son reality show?
Is this not the point where I should bring this conversation to a close and give room to your own comments as I wish you an INSPIRED week ahead?
Yours IN THE BEST INTEREST OF THE PRECIOUS AFRICAN CHILD,
E- S.A.F.E® Manual- https://bit.ly/ESAFE20Emanual
Twitter & Instagram: @taiwoakinlami
Facebook Group: Taiwo AKINLAMI Academy https://bit.ly/3bK8Zy0│
Telegram Channel: https://t.me/thefamilyclinic|
YouTube Channel: https://youtu.be/9S_HflFQinA
Blog- http://taiwoakinlamiblog.com –
Free- Ebook – http://bit.ly/SAFE4CHILDRENINTHECOVID19ERA
LOG AFRICA http://bit.ly/LOGAFRICA