Our Teenagers/Youths: The Falconers have Lost Falcons (2)

Dear custodians, permit me to bring to you the conclusion of the piece I began yesterday.

The painful truth is that many custodians are not aware of their influence and therefore do not place a demand on such massive influence. Unfortunately where the custodians do not place a demand on his/her influence, the influence must go to usurpers, the enemies of the souls of the young people, who are experts in sowing thorns. Nature is not known to abhor vacuum. Unfortunately, once the thorns are sown, it becomes almost impossible for it to be uprooted except by divine intervention and a determination of the young person and the custodians to humble themselves and reach out for superior knowledge.

I understand the dynamics because I experienced what I am writing about today. My parents and teachers were good people but clueless about their influence on me and how to positively used same to prepare me for the challenges of life. Unknown to them a dysfunctional child will become a dysfunctional adult. There are four ways a child could be abused; I suffered them all in abundance. My childhood was a bountiful basket of abuses. I was abused physically in the name of disciplined. I was abused sexually as I lost my virginity at the age of 6 to a neighbour, a woman, who my mother left me with when she went to the market. As a child I had started having sexual relationship with other children. As a teenager, I had become a paedophile. I was abused emotionally as I was chastised for everything I did wrong and never commended for anything I did right. I grew up with a siege mentality.

At age nine, my teacher in school had nickednamed me Satan or the devil when I lost a friend during our favourite game of tree climbing. Unknown to my handlers for every one wrong word you say to a child, you need seventeen to correct it. I was abused by neglect. My handlers were not available to lead me. I had begun the habits of drinking and smoking before I became a teenager. I learnt both habits from my father.  I grew up with any knowledge of life skills. Simply put, I was not prepared for the challenges of life. By the implication of my upbringing, I was destined to be under the slavery of life.

When I became 18 and left home, I was supposed to have attained maturity, I was yet a child. Age does not necessarily confer maturity. Maturity is the ability to submit one’s life to be governed by principles. I had delayed childhood for another 9 years.  I was on the path of destruction until age 27 when I gave my life to Christ and He began to make all the difference in my life. Please note this is not an attempt of pushing religion. It is a honest attempt compelled by conscience to share my personal experience of how I was rescued from the seemingly insurmountable impact of wrong upbringing.

I decided to give expression to this burden today again as an expression of gratitude to God for coming to my rescue. I answered His call to tell my story of childhood abuse, rescue and hope. I accepted the responsibility that the world has a lot to learn from my story on how to train children. For me, If do not live to tell this story; I am not fit to live. My conclusion today is very simple: custodians have a responsibility to give direction to the present generation of teenager and young adults. If we do not lead them, we lose the moral right to judge them. Lastly, I believe that the young people on the other hand have a responsibility to begin to deliberately delink from the impact of wrong upbringing and take their destiny into their hands. At the end of the day, young people must not forget that they have the capacity to change their destiny with the help of God. They need to understand that a new generation does not answer to time. It answers to a deliberation to turn the tide of things in the right direction. This, I am a living example of.

Thank you for joining me today. Do have an INSPIRED weekend.  See you on Monday.

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